Monday, December 17, 2007

Can you be quiet please?

Over the weekend the Wife and I decided to go see some movies. We attempted to see I am Legend Friday night but the movies was sold out so we decided on Beowulf and Greondal. Sitting behind us was a father with his two children of 13'ish. Apparently the kids new nothing of the movie or the back story which isn't surprising. I didn't either. So they did what kids do and began asking questions. A lot of questions. The father indulged by carrying on full conversations on the topic. They tried to use their inside voices but during a movie even the smallest sound carries. Kids are inquisitive, asking questions is what they do and its how they learn. But there is a place and time for that and its not during a movie. I could see that this was going to carry on through out the entire movie so I politely asked them to cease talking. They did and the movie turned out to be good. - Now this story isn't surprising, it happens a lot with children at the theatre. Its expected. This next example was not expected how ever.

Saturday night, attempt number two at seeing I am Legend. This time, the theatre is packed and sitting on the row behind us is a whole family of ADULTS. These people truly pissed me off. They weren't even trying to be quiet or subtle about their conversations. They were shouting shit out like "don't go in there!", "leave the dog and run!", "WATCH OUT!". Seriously, WTF?. This group consisted of about seven people I believe. This carried on for a good bit and just as I was ready to ask them to knock it off, what did I hear? My sweet little wife turns around and says with much authority "PLEASE STOP TALKING". The talking stopped. I was so impressed.

So for the rude people that like to talk during movies out there...SHUT THE FUCK UP!! You aren't at home on the sofa. Be considerate, we don't care how smart you think you are for figuring out the mystery.

Friday, December 14, 2007



Seven simple little words that can mean the difference between being dependable or not. This is an area that I feel pretty strongly about. The reason is because my child hood has been wrought with people making false promises or broken dates. What is so hard about making a commitment and sticking to it? Can there be anything more detrimental to a child's moral? This applies to adults as well. Have you ever made an appointment with friends or family and just not shown up? Maybe you were just late.

When I was 10 yrs old my Aunt came and picked me up with the intention of taking me to Six Flags in Georgia. We made a quick stop at a friends house where she told me we would only stay for a few hours. Afterwards we were suppose to continue on to her place, spend the night and then head out to Six Flags in the morning. Once we arrived at her friend's house she began drinking and playing cards with a group of people. I was shuffled off to a back bedroom where I stayed for the remainder of the night. We didn't go to Six Flags as you might have guessed. That is one memory that has always stayed with me.

People that aren't reliable just don't get much stock in my book.

Thursday, December 13, 2007

Sandy Vagina Example

"You know what I hate. PEOPLE that don't have any kids making comments about other peoples kids. Or even some impatient person beathing down my neck when I'm tring to teach my kids not to be a pain in the ass of other people. So that when they grow up they might be a pillar of the comunity and lend a hand instead of huffing and puffing. chomping at the bit to get home and start a blog about thing that bother them. What I think we need in this world is one less person getting is there head they are doing some service to society by posting this crap on the internet. In fact this persone was probably in a McDonald's which is notorious KIDS. Maybe you should put effort into changing the establishments policy, So that they will start having a Prick line and a non-Prick line. If I wait 15 or even 20 mins. waiting for my food I expect to stand in the condament until I get every thing I need to enjoy my meal with out having to get up and get more or leave my kids unitended. Yeah Joe make this a sticky so we can all know what Jerry has to say about life. " -Rage

Decision makers at the drink machine


Seriously, how much time does it take to decide what you want to drink?!?! What bugs me most in the universe I think, are people that take for ever at the drink machine! And not just those people, but the people who go to the drink machine, get their drink but continue to stand in front of the drink machine while they get straws, napkins, lids, ten thousand cups of sauce... WTF?!?!?! be considerate of others around you! Did you never stop to think that there may be people other than you in that restaurant at that exact moment?!?!

Now, lets talk about the other annoyances that can happen at the soda fountain. Lets talk about the kids that feel the need to fill their cup to the top, then stop to let the bubbles subside, then rinse and repeat until it is absolutely full to the top. On average that process takes about 4 tries to get "full". ITS FREE F*CKING REFILLS!!! Nough said about that.

In closing I would like to say just one more thing on the subject of fast food restaurant etiquette...

CONTROL YOUR DAMN KIDS!! The bars that make up the queue area are not a freaking jungle gym.

This post is dedicated to my wife, who may get annoyed by these things worse than me. :D

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

First Post - Explanation

Hello all, I'd like to dedicate my first post to explaining the name of my blog.

Imagine if you will, that you are a woman walking on the beach early one morning. Some how, you slip and fall getting a whole load of sand down your pants. You stand up and try to bounce the excess sand from your nether region but of course you can't seem to get it all. So you head off to do what ever it is that you have planned for that day. As the day progresses you begin to realize that some of that sand has hitched a ride nestled safely between the folds of your labia and as you walk those tiny little pieces of glass-like sand are making their presence known. Every step you take brings more and more discomfort as these little pieces of agony rub one of your most sensitive areas raw. Even the slightest movement feels like a cheese grater wedged between your vaginal lips.

Imagine how irritated you would be after a few hours of this. You could rip the head off a puppy and stomp on its body.

Now that you have a clear definition of what it is to have a sandy vagina you will better understand the blog name and my position on the things we'll be talking about here.